14 Things You Should Never Say to Your Spouse

With the rise of breakups, separation, and divorces, mainly citing irreconcilable differences, the starting brings long and painful moments later in life.

Committing to someone and later breaking the bond; some things can be repaired and avoided at all costs with some guidance.

If you feel that you are ready to take the down-mentioned tips to save your relationship or to make it as happy as possible, keep scrolling.

Here are some proven and widely followed best advice to follow to maintain respect and love in your marriage in fourteen easy points:

#14. Don’t Say “Shut Up!” Or “Get Out!” Amid The Fights

Though these simple words “Shut Up” or “Get Out” during the heat of the moment get blurted out and seem normal, sadly, the meaning it depicts is the same.

These powerful words during the high tension of arguments mean otherwise. And your spouse can easily misplace the emotions to something more profound, worsening the fight.

Precisely, these words, when said during fights, can come out as very rude, impolite, or profanity, and in extreme conditions, they may also be interpreted as a suppressive order.

As your partner comprehends much from the fight and these words, they may feel that you no longer value them, and things might worsen from the next moment.

Therefore, words like these are some that you should never say to your spouse when you are in a heated argument.

#13. Don’t Say “You’re Overreacting” To Something When Your Partner Is Concerned About It

If you are mature enough to get concerned about your partner’s perception, never forget this; don’t tell them they are “overreacting” to a matter.

Instead, process the situation as quickly as possible and be calm while one is panicking or unrestrained about that certain case.

Always remember to get a hold of your emotions and try to understand your spouse’s reactive emotions without discarding them.

This will definitely prove a change between you two, and your better half may also read your contribution to the relationship.

One must understand that saying “You’re overreacting” to anyone during any situation disrespects their emotions.

#12. Don’t Ever Say “You Don’t Make Me Happy (Anymore.).”

You can never ever say to your spouse that they don’t make you happy or they don’t bring happiness to you anymore.

This is the last limit of a relationship boundary to hold on to one committed person. Saying these words, without a doubt, indicates that you are shifting all the blame on your partner on top of questioning their presence in your life.

Many’s marriages have broken because one has said these words and not feel any regret about it.

But, being the understanding person you are, you must remember that you should never repeat that old mistake. If you feel no happiness in your marriage, try to add more romance or seek marriage guidance instead of blaming your partner.

Considering your love and care for them, careless remarks might end your relationship, and nothing you do can repair it.

#11. Don’t Say “Can You Get A Real Job?”

Reader’s Digest Asia has clearly explained this situation when you may start to think that your partner’s career may not be good enough to be impressive for you and society.

But, remember thus, when you’re in a relationship, you should give respect to take respect. Suggest to them if you can help them progress but don’t ever bicker with them about the work that may mean a lot to them.

Or, if your partner stays home taking care of the house, try to understand their decision for some time. Time will eventually bring a change in them, and you can definitely suggest to them the best work options.

These simple words during your impulsiveness will surely crack the foundation of your marriage. And your spouse may never feel the same respect towards you again, resulting in your painful or bitter separation.

#10. Don’t Haunt Them With Your Superiority By Saying “Learn More” or “You Know Nothing!”

One thing that will always concern your partner is if you have shown your greatness of knowledge compared to them.

On top of that, saying prudent words like “You know nothing” or “You need to learn more” adds fuel to the fire, making your partner brand you as a person who knows it all.

And you are coming out as the arrogant one in the relationship and a fun person not worthy of respect for your actions.

Be a more understandable person, and if you feel they lack knowledge in the area you are aware of, help them out.

Take some time out of your schedule and spend some fun and quality time, giving them a chance to learn in those happy moments.

But avoid blurting out the above sentences at all costs if you want to save your marriage and earn your spouse’s respect.

#9. Avoid Saying “If You Really Love Me, Do This Or That For Me.”

Consider yourself a manipulative person in the marriage if you have been saying, “If you really love me, you would do this or that for me.”

Or, if your partner has been saying this sentence many times now, take precautions to avoid such situations where you are falling into their mind games.

Marriage is a commitment and a bond to be equal and support each other’s life till the end. A loving and understanding spouse shouldn’t rake up opportunities to make their partner do something by giving the condition of their love.

This is a big no when you are seeking to settle down with your partner. Hence, look for positive traits in your partner to lighten up your love life.

#8. Don’t Threaten Saying “I Want Divorce” When You Don’t Mean It

You should definitely refrain from threatening to divorce your partner repeatedly when you don’t mean it.

Divorce is a significant matter concerning the two’s relationship, family, and children. Its effects are long-lasting, and the mental pressures on the couple’s family are widely noticeable.

Hence, whether joking or threatening divorce, it almost always brings the same effect to your marriage. Your spouse may lose their hope of reconciliation and respect for you.

#7. Don’t Answer “Nothing” When Your Partner Is Really Concerned For You

“Nothing” may mean nothing, but saying nothing when your spouse asks you, could do invisible but hurtful damage to them and later your marriage.

Stacey Feintuch from Reader’s Digest Asia writes that when you reply with aloof words such as “whatever” or “nothing,” it can make your spouse feel like you’re minimizing and dismissing their feelings.

You can smile and hug it if you feel like not sharing your tension. However, sharing both happiness and sadness with your partner is the key to the ultimate marriage of people.

#6. Don’t Say “I Don’t Believe You” To Your Partner

While trust plays the most crucial part in your marriage, don’t ever say that you don’t believe your partner in an impulse.

If you suspect they are being untruthful, confront them with more soothing words and give them time to open up.

Try to understand at first that the problem your spouse is facing may be too big for them to handle. Being together and understanding each other’s shortcomings make a happy couple.

#5. Don’t Bring Out Bitter Past Memories or Mistakes Of Your Spouse During Arguments

The most unsophisticated thing that one can do is bring out the bitter memories regarding their spouse’s past mistakes during a heated argument.

Despite the situation’s desperate calls, doing so is not impressive work to do. If you fall on the list of partners who have a habit of calling out your mate’s past actions to silence them in the fight, you are on the wrong lane.

Instead of winning the fight, you are losing your spouse to never returning to your life side.

Doing this makes you look uncool and immature, despite your age and social status. Always respect your partner and don’t judge them, especially for their past.

#4. Don’t Label Them As The “Crazy One” In The Marriage

Another uncool thing you can do is call your partner “crazy” and “irrational” during your conversations and main arguments.

Mostly husbands do this to their wives. Daily Mail UK provided a detailed research report into such cases labeling this behavior as “gaslight.”

Gaslighting is a form of manipulation involving tricking someone into doubting their sanity. Everyone should avoid gaslighting their dear partners to enjoy a happy marriage.

#3. Don’t Communicate Passive-Aggressive

One may not accept a passive-aggressive partner, but love conquers it all.

Many couples have reported their problems regarding their passive-aggressive relationship, where a partner might be nice and cheerful at one point but negative and oppositional behind another’s back.

CBN’s 2019 report on such relationships and the same in other fields might be helpful for people experiencing such sorts of situations.

However, it is better to change for good to bring real happiness to your spouse and the marriage.

#2. Don’t Startle Your Partner With “You’ve Changed” Dialogue

You may have noticed some changes in your marriage and your spouse with the passing time. However, you mentioning them every time in critical times may make your partner feel uncomfortable.

Your Tango heartily suggests that instead of using the term, lighten up your partner’s mood by saying “evolved.”

However, focus on a healthy, evolved marriage and keep each other happy.

#1. Don’t Say “I’m Only With You For The Kids.”

If you are unhappy in the marriage, you may feel quite light to blurt out your kids’ involvement in keeping your marriage intact.

However, that will harm your spouse more than you can imagine. All these mental pressure plays a big role in breaking down what’s in your marriage.

Thus, being transparent with each other and loving to the ends without a change could do wonders.

The above-mentioned advice is proven to be helpful for adults to achieve a happy marriage.